FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 18, 2026100% OUTRAGEOUS. 0% ACTUAL NEWS.VOL. 01 • ISSUE 001

BREAKING-ish

Local man “just resting his eyes” enters third presidential administration ✦ Mercury demands to stop being blamed for your texts ✦ More as we make it up.

THE WEEK THE WORLD GOT WEIRDERIndependent. Irresponsible. Entirely imaginary.

EXCLUSIVE • NEIGHBORHOOD WATCH

BIGFOOT SPOTTED.
HE’S YOUR HOA
PRESIDENT.

After 40 years in hiding, elusive creature emerges to complain about your fence.

Fictional Bigfoot wearing a safety vest and holding coffee at a misty construction site

Artist’s recreation. Witness credibility: extremely low.PHOTO: WTF FIELD DESK

Residents say the 8-foot cryptid is “surprisingly passionate about approved mailbox colors.”

READ THE UNBELIEVABLE STORY ↗

FRESH OFF THE PRESS.
STILL COMPLETELY MADE UP.

DAILY FICTIONAL DISPATCHES

Loading the latest fictional dispatches…

YOU CAN’T MAKE THIS UP.
WE DID, THOUGH.

DISPATCHES FROM THE DEEP END

01 STRANGE BUT UNTRUE

Moon found on marketplace. Seller says “no lowballers.”

Minor cratering. One previous owner. Must collect.

02 AFTERLIFE & LIFESTYLE

Ghost quits haunting after discovering the rent.

“For that price, you should be scared without my help.”

03 SCIENCE GONE SIDEWAYS

Time traveler goes back to 1998. Decides to stay.

Scientist cites affordable housing, no group chats.

THIS JUST IN

SMALL PRINT.
BIG NONSENSE.

Mercury hires publicist, denies being in retrograde.CELESTIAL CELEBRITIES ↗Smart fridge refuses to open: “We both know you’re bored.”TECHNOLOGY HAS GONE TOO FAR ↗Town elects duck mayor. Approval rating hits 98%.QUACKING NEWS ↗

REAL LIFE IS WEIRD.
WE TAKE IT PERSONALLY.

WTF Weekly is an independent satire publication. Every story, character, quote, and “exclusive” on this site is fictional. Please don’t cite us in a meeting.